https://tapas.io/episode/794019
So i'm doing a comic and i would like to hear some opinions on it.

Well artwise I feel like it's very unpolished, and judging by your sketchbook I know that you can do better.

I'm not really good with lineart myself, but I can tell that you're all over the place with it. There's a lot of lines that don't meet up, or they cross each other and you didn't clean it up afterwards.
Also I feel like this thick ink brush with a lot of variety tends to look pretty amatureish. Since half of the lines go from 9000 to 0.
Also I'd use text bubbles that already exist, rather then drawing them by hand. And I'm not sure why did you write some text by hand if you already had a nice font.

Overall I feel like you are skipping steps in drawing to get on with the story faster. But then by the page 7 we have 2 characters meet up and exchange names. Which makes me wonder if all those frames were really neccesary.

Sorry if it sound harsh, but I hope that it helps.

Well artwise I feel like it's very unpolished, and judging by your sketchbook I know that you can do better.

I'm not really good with lineart myself, but I can tell that you're all over the place with it. There's a lot of lines that don't meet up, or they cross each other and you didn't clean it up afterwards.
Also I feel like this thick ink brush with a lot of variety tends to look pretty amatureish. Since half of the lines go from 9000 to 0.
Also I'd use text bubbles that already exist, rather then drawing them by hand. And I'm not sure why did you write some text by hand if you already had a nice font.

Overall I feel like you are skipping steps in drawing to get on with the story faster. But then by the page 7 we have 2 characters meet up and exchange names. Which makes me wonder if all those frames were really neccesary.

Sorry if it sound harsh, but I hope that it helps.

No problem.Yeah,i'm not very good with lineart.I love thick lineart,so i may try to use brush with less variety.
Unfortunately this is the best i can do,i'm not skipping steps or anything

Hmm I see ... I feel like a lot of work in your sketchbook has better ballanced line quality, but I suppose it could be a matter of personal taste (as I don't like thick linearts myself).
Or perhaps you might be struggling with applying it into your comic's style ? As your sketchbook stuff is more realistic.

Hmm I see ... I feel like a lot of work in your sketchbook has better ballanced line quality, but I suppose it could be a matter of personal taste (as I don't like thick linearts myself).
Or perhaps you might be struggling with applying it into your comic's style ? As your sketchbook stuff is more realistic.

I don't know,i think that my sketchbook art is very old and outdated,so yeah,it's probably a matter of taste.im trying to do more cartoony style.

First of all, good job for actually starting a project. As far as improvement goes, I think studying your fundamentals is what will take your work to the next level. Learning how to construct simple forms and seeing the body as being composed of those forms, lightning those forms based on the anatomy, understanding how fabric works, studying perspective more and understanding how spaceships and environments. Michael Hampton: Figure drawing design and structure, Peter Han: Dynamic bible, Marshall vandruff perspective series, Proko, Loomis, Bridgeman, are all resources worth checking out in order to study these fundamentals in more depth.

So this is not really a critique, but I gotta know if this was some what inspired by Ben Saint from http://saintcomix.com/, because it reminds me A LOT of his style.

So this is not really a critique, but I gotta know if this was some what inspired by Ben Saint from http://saintcomix.com/, because it reminds me A LOT of his style.

i've only seen a few of his sketches in youtube,but holy shit,you are right.I haven't made any conscious decision to mimic the style or anyhing