Submit your artwork for critiques here, or give someone else some helpful criticism or advice on their artwork. Please keep things civil.

Moderators: Ambiguity, SeaQuenchal, Waveloop, imcostalong, virtueone

 

Postby Wyervan » Fri Apr 28, 2017 5:01 am

User avatar
  Wyervan
Posts: 93
Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2014 3:18 pm
Location: USA

Subject title: Crazy Bandit and Green Mountains

Hey guys tell me what you think! I'm open to any sort of critique, I don't have any particular points to discuss so have at it! Rip me a new one!
let it shine copy.jpg

 

Postby snisetski » Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:34 pm

User avatar
  snisetski
Posts: 99
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:43 pm

Wyervan wrote:Hey guys tell me what you think! I'm open to any sort of critique, I don't have any particular points to discuss so have at it! Rip me a new one!



Okay so I'm not quite sure on what exactly he's sitting on. Maybe you can make that clear? Also the background is too bland, too bright actually. His torso looks a little too pushed back.

The rest looks amazing, you can increase the contrast and work more on the colors~

 

Postby giwayume » Tue May 02, 2017 5:47 pm

  giwayume
Posts: 16
Joined: Mon Apr 10, 2017 5:42 am

I think you might find it helpful to use a poseable skeleton app to create poses like this, since you're not used to them. It will have helped you identify the following issues:
1. His torso (rib cage) is not leaning forward nearly enough. In order for the elbows to reach the knees, you have to lean forward quite a bit as well as prompt your legs up.
2. Because the torso would be leaning much farther forward, it would be difficult for him to crane his neck back this much to look up. Try this pose yourself and see how hard it is to look up while your elbows are resting on your knees.
3. Foreshortening on his right (viewer's left) leg, The base of the leg (indicated by the wrinkles in the pants) doesn't appear to be pointing to the knee, but instead somewhere off to the side.

Anatomy:
1. His trapezius is missing! He's going to have a hard time lifting his arms.
2. His right (viewer's left) deltoid: It shouldn't poke out on the top and create a bump like that. It attaches along the clavicle, acromion process, and spine of the scapula, and drops down from there. It doesn't bulge up.
3. His left (viewer's right) shoulder: That line that points downward that's on the top of the bicep, I'm assuming that's supposed to be the pectoral muscle? It actually attaches underneath the deltoid so it would be pointing in a more horizontal manner. Also, this arm appears to be twisted too much. You would primarily see the bicep from this angle. It doesn't look like it's attached at the shoulder correctly. Think of how the clavicle moves with the arm, and don't break it.

 

Postby Gryephon » Thu May 04, 2017 12:23 am

User avatar
  Gryephon
Posts: 494
Joined: Sun Aug 03, 2014 9:38 pm

You might have some better luck with composition if you break it down into thirds.

let it shine copy.jpg
If you clean a vacuum cleaner, you become a vacuum cleaner.

Sketchbook: Click Here
Deviant: Click Here

 

Postby Wyervan » Mon May 08, 2017 4:37 am

User avatar
  Wyervan
Posts: 93
Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2014 3:18 pm
Location: USA

Thank you so much for all the feedback (sorry I'm a bit slow on responding)

snisetski wrote:Okay so I'm not quite sure on what exactly he's sitting on. Maybe you can make that clear? Also the background is too bland, too bright actually. His torso looks a little too pushed back.

The rest looks amazing, you can increase the contrast and work more on the colors~


Yes I totally see what you mean by not being able to figure out what he's sitting on. I didn't pay as much attention to that much when painting as I should have.

giwayume wrote:I think you might find it helpful to use a poseable skeleton app to create poses like this, since you're not used to them. It will have helped you identify the following issues:
1. His torso (rib cage) is not leaning forward nearly enough. In order for the elbows to reach the knees, you have to lean forward quite a bit as well as prompt your legs up.
2. Because the torso would be leaning much farther forward, it would be difficult for him to crane his neck back this much to look up. Try this pose yourself and see how hard it is to look up while your elbows are resting on your knees.
3. Foreshortening on his right (viewer's left) leg, The base of the leg (indicated by the wrinkles in the pants) doesn't appear to be pointing to the knee, but instead somewhere off to the side.

Anatomy:
1. His trapezius is missing! He's going to have a hard time lifting his arms.
2. His right (viewer's left) deltoid: It shouldn't poke out on the top and create a bump like that. It attaches along the clavicle, acromion process, and spine of the scapula, and drops down from there. It doesn't bulge up.
3. His left (viewer's right) shoulder: That line that points downward that's on the top of the bicep, I'm assuming that's supposed to be the pectoral muscle? It actually attaches underneath the deltoid so it would be pointing in a more horizontal manner. Also, this arm appears to be twisted too much. You would primarily see the bicep from this angle. It doesn't look like it's attached at the shoulder correctly. Think of how the clavicle moves with the arm, and don't break it.


Thank you so much for this detailed response on the anatomy of the figure. I'll be sure to definitely do more research in posing and reference more actual photos of people in this position, maybe even take photos myself or use that posing app you recommended :D

Gryephon wrote:You might have some better luck with composition if you break it down into thirds.

let it shine copy.jpg


This would be an interesting alternative; however, I don't know if I intended the composition to be that long horizontally. Do you have any recommendations for a composition that would be closer in size to the original?


Return to Critique This!

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests

cron