Submit your artwork for critiques here, or give someone else some helpful criticism or advice on their artwork. Please keep things civil.

Moderators: Ambiguity, SeaQuenchal, Waveloop, imcostalong, virtueone

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:39 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

Subject title: I just don't know what went wrong :(

I just don't know what is wrong with my picture. :(
So like, please help?
Spoiler: show
Portraitsemimaybeokfnallevels.png
CritiqueThis

 

Postby Sycra » Thu Jun 21, 2012 10:22 pm

User avatar
  Sycra
Site Admin
Posts: 210
Joined: Tue Dec 27, 2011 1:32 pm

I did a quick paintover to show some areas you could improve on. Important areas are things like the face being in 3/4 but the eyes being kind of facing forward, the body is too small for her head, and the ear needs more care.

Image

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 8:41 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

I made another try at the portrait thing.

Spoiler: show
DasPortrait.png


So I (personally think) that I more or less managed to improve thanks to the critique from Sycra (a paint-over? That's too awesome! Please let me know if there's some kind of donate-button. I did not find one myself, but I am lazy/stupid).

I would love to hear what you guys think! :)

 

Postby sgtmikey101 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 9:07 pm

User avatar
  sgtmikey101
Posts: 587
Joined: Thu May 31, 2012 3:48 am

you did a spectacular job :D

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 9:31 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

sgtmikey101 wrote:you did a spectacular job :D

Thank you so much! :D

Though it warms my heart to hear you say such things, it would warm my heart even more if you could completely trash my painting instead. :)

 

Postby Minako008 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 10:17 pm

  Minako008
Posts: 433
Joined: Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:10 pm

I really love the eyes and mouth.=) Charming!^_^ Also, you did a great job with the hair.) The only thing I can mention is that neck looks too thick, especially for woman.

 

Postby Ambiguity » Mon Sep 24, 2012 11:46 pm

User avatar
  Ambiguity
Posts: 5524
Joined: Thu May 17, 2012 7:55 am
Location: Your dreams

+1 to everything Minako said, and also her left eyebrow(on the right side of the painting) is a tad too far in IMO.

 

Postby Waveloop » Tue Sep 25, 2012 4:49 am

User avatar
  Waveloop
Posts: 1122
Joined: Wed Sep 12, 2012 1:31 pm
Location: Portugal

Good Job with the hair... and the face in general... but I get a creepy feeling when I look at the portraid, it's like the body is facing away, and the head is twisted 180 towards the viewer... It's a bit unsettling... Mostly the neck is to thick, and the muscles anatomy is a bit strange...
Keep it up

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:00 am

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

Thanks for all the tips!

I tried to correct everything, but the body was too hard for me so i tried to draw attention from it with a black border.

Spoiler: show
dasportraitv2.png

 

Postby Waveloop » Tue Sep 25, 2012 2:38 pm

User avatar
  Waveloop
Posts: 1122
Joined: Wed Sep 12, 2012 1:31 pm
Location: Portugal

It´s a lot better... I would just do a couple of things... does not seem to be aliened with the neck... I would move the head a littel to the left... and then define a bit more the neck muscles.

but it's a lot better now

cheers

 

Postby Sycra » Wed Oct 03, 2012 10:30 pm

User avatar
  Sycra
Site Admin
Posts: 210
Joined: Tue Dec 27, 2011 1:32 pm

Image

Hey, your recent one is way better! It looks really nice. There are just a few points I'd point out to you. One is the neck, as has been mentioned already. The other is to make sure that the eyeball sits inside the eye socket and the eyelids wrap around it. Finally, the angle of the shirt texture makes the body look really flat. Remember the form of the ribcage, how it goes outward, not just down, and include that information in your pictures.

Otherwise, great work. I really like it a lot.

 

Postby Taguian » Thu Oct 04, 2012 1:03 am

User avatar
  Taguian
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:37 am

love the second one, you're awsome :D

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Thu Nov 01, 2012 7:59 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

I'm really sorry I didn't respond to Sycra and the others, but I was sure this thread was dead. Won't make that mistake again (turned on notifications).
Thank you so much for the criticism, it really helps! Especially the paint-over, now I (hopefully) know how to handle the eye thing.

I've actually managed to paint something again (gasp) and I would appreciate any eventual criticism.
Spoiler: show
okt31-anatomipractisefinalresize.png
2012nov1

 

Postby sgtmikey101 » Fri Nov 02, 2012 3:46 am

User avatar
  sgtmikey101
Posts: 587
Joined: Thu May 31, 2012 3:48 am

OMG THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU REALLY OUT DID YOURSELF. I CAN"T PROVIDE CRITICISM BECAUSE YOUR ON A WHOLE OTHER LEVEL

 

Postby Alexanderthefake » Fri Nov 02, 2012 9:42 am

  Alexanderthefake
Posts: 10
Joined: Tue Oct 30, 2012 5:09 am

No, dont change anything you just need loving support. :) its a good style! Dont worry about proportions or technique, style is woeth more.

 

Postby alnoth » Fri Nov 02, 2012 9:54 am

  alnoth
Posts: 1271
Joined: Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:30 am

a few minor points i see...

- where her shoulders connect to the dress, it seems as if the detail was done so, that there is a quite noticable jump in the outline of the upper arm.

- her neck is against the very light background and i think should have a crisper outline (i realize the style is sort of hazy on purpose, but still, thats my opinion)

- lastly her right fore-arm seems to have a concave curvature, which if not straight, should be convex imo


but a very nice effort overall :)
okt31-anatomipractisefinalresize.png

 

Postby Ambiguity » Fri Nov 02, 2012 7:52 pm

User avatar
  Ambiguity
Posts: 5524
Joined: Thu May 17, 2012 7:55 am
Location: Your dreams

I find it odd that her left eyebrow(our right) doesn't seem to be attached to her glabella(the triangular shape that attaches the nose to the forehead) like the right one.

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:10 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

Thank you for the critique everyone!

I tried to do some quick adjustments to the drawing, according to your advice:
Spoiler: show
okt31-anatomipractisefinalresize3.png
YAY PAINTING

 

Postby GauntletsTheArtist » Fri Nov 02, 2012 11:45 pm

  GauntletsTheArtist
Posts: 107
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2012 6:24 am

Sorry 4 bringin' dis up... Truly I am... but would I b wrong 2 address u as "Derpy Hooves" right now? :D

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Tue Feb 05, 2013 10:25 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

GauntletsTheArtist wrote:Sorry 4 bringin' dis up... Truly I am... but would I b wrong 2 address u as "Derpy Hooves" right now? :D

I'd be honored.=P

I've got a new one for you guys! =)
Spoiler: show
20130205-girlagainRESIZE.png

 

Postby Zjacklee » Wed Feb 06, 2013 6:39 pm

User avatar
  Zjacklee
Posts: 1579
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2012 4:13 am

hey there.
first of all, nice idea. the face of the girl is also looking good. the use of colours isn't bad either.
what bothers me the most right now is that the figure itself however is lacking in posture and figure.

the head seems to be missing a bit in the back and the figure is leaning allot forward. to the viewers left.
Look closely. Can you really See?!

http://zjacklee.deviantart.com/ that's my deviant. ^_^

https://www.facebook.com/Trplerainbow My fanpage.

 

Postby Solicitude7 » Wed Feb 06, 2013 10:28 pm

  Solicitude7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:28 pm

Zjacklee wrote:hey there.
first of all, nice idea. the face of the girl is also looking good. the use of colours isn't bad either.
what bothers me the most right now is that the figure itself however is lacking in posture and figure.

the head seems to be missing a bit in the back and the figure is leaning allot forward. to the viewers left.

Spoiler: show
20130205-girlagainRESIZECorr.png

I tried to adress some of the problems (head, lean) with liquify and painting over.

In retrospect, the pose makes no sense at all. I don't think it's worth it to redo, well basically everything.

Thank you for your critique :) , I think I'm going to do some gesture studies in the near future.

 

Postby perkexpert » Thu Feb 07, 2013 11:39 pm

User avatar
  perkexpert
Posts: 879
Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:37 pm
Location: Germany

Nice start on your last one, but lighting is off and i think you might need to work on overall anatomy and pose before going into too much painting. Your figure looks a bit flat so keep on working on forms and 3d-shapes by lighting and good linework.
Homo sapiens non urinat in ventum
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/artofhannesmangelsdorf/
Homepage: www.perkexpert.com


Return to Critique This!

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests