Submit your artwork for critiques here, or give someone else some helpful criticism or advice on their artwork. Please keep things civil.

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Postby Thril3r » Sat Feb 09, 2013 11:33 pm

  Thril3r
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Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:24 pm

Subject title: I`m beginner and i need some critiques

My name is Alex and I'm 16 and i want critiques because i want to correct my mistakes.
I drawed until now just 1-2 per month like a hobby, but from december i took this hobby more seriously, and now i want to learn how to draw correctly and understand what i want to draw and maybe over 10 years to be a concept artist or something :D i need some critiques and to know what mistakes i made. Now I make gesture drawings and anatomy studies.
Sycra sure you can use whatever you want for a video critique.

Image
Image
Image

At portrait i had problems with the hair (i dunno how to make the hair on paper) but i tried to remake the hair in photoshop and was much better. Anyway... my first portrait.
The robot is a sketch made from my mind but is not done yet, i have to add more tanks or other stuff but i want to know if i`m on the right way.

P.S: Sorry for my bad english (if something is wrong) but i`m not native :D

 

Postby Zjacklee » Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:47 pm

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Hi there and welcome to the forum. you have some nice goals setup and you have the advantage you are starting so young! :)
Practicing is always good. Right now for the portrait drawing you will have to observe and concentrate on your subject a bit better. ( try mirroring your drawing. this will show you mistakes that you can't see anymore because you have been staring at it for too long. Our minds tend to mess up like that. it's a common problem for artists. )

anyways, keep up the good work and i'm looking forward to your progress. ;)
Look closely. Can you really See?!

http://zjacklee.deviantart.com/ that's my deviant. ^_^

https://www.facebook.com/Trplerainbow My fanpage.

 

Postby Roger » Sun Feb 10, 2013 5:30 pm

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Portraiture is difficult if you aren't drawing someone in real life. Images don't give you the actual depth of someone face and the curves the faces have. Also, if you are free handing(no guidelines) try using measurements between eyes, nose, mouth, ears to figure out what goes where.
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=11 Come visit my Sketchbook!

 

Postby Scissel » Sun Feb 10, 2013 6:14 pm

  Scissel
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Child.png


Hey there,

That's a really good effort, I would say to you to try and focus your efforts on keeping your drawing in proportion. Start off by really paying a lot of attention to the shape of the person's head. If you look at your drawing the eye's and the eye brows are in proportion with each other and mouth and chin are in proportion with each other but because you've drawn the head slightly thinner and longer than in the photo, they are now a lot thinner. So I would focus on get shape of the head right before you start drawing the details. But overall a really good effort.

 

Postby alnoth » Sun Feb 10, 2013 7:30 pm

  alnoth
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i would say some of that might be corrected if he actually scanned the image in. i think he was taking it a weird angle...

 

Postby perkexpert » Mon Feb 11, 2013 12:54 am

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Hi Scissel,

welcome to the forums. First of all good habit to take things more seriously and practice a lot. Some things about your robot scene: The perspective and scale it totall off, the bridge leads to the robot which would be
about 3 times the human on the same plane, or the red robot in my paintover. When doing this kind of shot, make yourself a reference unit, like a human (red line in my messed up scene). Second: Think of composition and story first, when you want to depict scale, do so by comparing known objects right beside it like humans. There are a lot of things to consider to make
for some epic battle scene, like lighting, perspective, composition, characters, vehicles and so on, so maybe start with sth. more simple or elements of it
I made some scribbles to show my points. Keep it up!
asdfadf.jpg
critique.jpg
Homo sapiens non urinat in ventum
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Postby Waveloop » Mon Feb 11, 2013 2:09 am

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perkexpert wrote:Hi Scissel,

welcome to the forums. First of all good habit to take things more seriously and practice a lot. Some things about your robot scene: The perspective and scale it totall off, the bridge leads to the robot which would be
about 3 times the human on the same plane, or the red robot in my paintover. When doing this kind of shot, make yourself a reference unit, like a human (red line in my messed up scene). Second: Think of composition and story first, when you want to depict scale, do so by comparing known objects right beside it like humans. There are a lot of things to consider to make
for some epic battle scene, like lighting, perspective, composition, characters, vehicles and so on, so maybe start with sth. more simple or elements of it
I made some scribbles to show my points. Keep it up!


... I really can't make any sense of what your saying... Your sketches just seem to bring a different point of view and not any correction at all... In a front view like that it depends on your start point so every thing goes. I can't see you adding anything with does scribbles...no offense Perk... I'm just not seeing it...probably it's just me in my limitations... Please make this entry clearer... Cuz this stuff is useful.

 

Postby Total100 » Mon Feb 11, 2013 3:28 am

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Location: in my room. 1 laptop for video another laptop for forum. and a 1 sketchbook for drawing...

oh cool another alex! welcome to the forum!

you might want to get used to compairing. draw it as best as you can. then go in photoshop and merge your drawing right above the image with lower opactity and see what is off. also try to mirror both images!
"Art is my cooking channel, i watch it, drool over it, and hope to one day make it."
I'm Alex, I'm 12,
Here is my sketchbook= viewtopic.php?f=3&t=2900 :)

 

Postby alnoth » Mon Feb 11, 2013 8:59 am

  alnoth
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dude, wave, how can you not be seeing that? :shock:

the bridge just accidentaly aligns with the robots shoulder, it is nowhere near it, actually. or if it is, the robots feet are on a floor completely different to the floor we can see (the robots feet must be a LOT lower than the floor we see). actually, as indicated, the robot bursts thru the floor with the bottom of his chest piece, all the rest of the robot is below the floor level.
asdfadf.jpg

 

Postby perkexpert » Mon Feb 11, 2013 9:49 am

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Ok, hi Thril3r (sorry for wrong name last time),
and thanks wave and alnoth (you did see sth in my crude sketch, thx :9) for the comment. I try to make myself clearer: When taking the door as a reference scale point of 2m, then everything on that plane has this scale.
So the columns underneath would be around 3m, but the robot is much bigger and therefore not "grounded". I assume you wanted the gallery/bridge to lead right to the head of the robot, just as alnoth indicated. So either the gallery has to be made higher (by dropping the ground) or the robot has to shrink to stand correctly on the ground. Same goes for the tank on the right. I contructed a battletank as an example of hopefully correct scale starting
on the plane of the human/door. The tank would be 3m high, around 3,8m wide and almost 8m long. As the robot is probably way bigger it just shows, that the scale
in thirl3rs sketch needs adjustment. These could be: Shrinking the door about half would make the tank double in size or shrinking to a fourth of the original size, would quadruple
the tank size. If you stick with the existing door, you would need to drop the ground plane a lot. I hope this is clearer now, cheers!
tanks.jpg
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Postby Thril3r » Mon Feb 11, 2013 10:33 am

  Thril3r
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Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:24 pm

Hi all and thanks for help.

Zjacklee wrote:Hi there and welcome to the forum. you have some nice goals setup and you have the advantage you are starting so young! :)
Practicing is always good. Right now for the portrait drawing you will have to observe and concentrate on your subject a bit better. ( try mirroring your drawing. this will show you mistakes that you can't see anymore because you have been staring at it for too long. Our minds tend to mess up like that. it's a common problem for artists. )

anyways, keep up the good work and i'm looking forward to your progress. ;)


Hmm I thought was too late for me to become a concept artist but you said "you have the advantage you are starting so young!| i'm surprised :D, I will try to mirror my next drawings.

Roger wrote:Portraiture is difficult if you aren't drawing someone in real life. Images don't give you the actual depth of someone face and the curves the faces have. Also, if you are free handing(no guidelines) try using measurements between eyes, nose, mouth, ears to figure out what goes where.


I will try to find someone and try to make a portratit from real life.

Scissel wrote: Hey there,

That's a really good effort, I would say to you to try and focus your efforts on keeping your drawing in proportion. Start off by really paying a lot of attention to the shape of the person's head. If you look at your drawing the eye's and the eye brows are in proportion with each other and mouth and chin are in proportion with each other but because you've drawn the head slightly thinner and longer than in the photo, they are now a lot thinner. So I would focus on get shape of the head right before you start drawing the details. But overall a really good effort.


I will try to focus more on proportion next time, but i think is hard to get the same proportions X_X I have to practice at this point but i don`t know how.

alnoth wrote:i would say some of that might be corrected if he actually scanned the image in. i think he was taking it a weird angle...


The angle is good, my proportions are bad. :(

---------
Wow, i didn't know my sketch is an epic fail, until now i made just 2-3 perspective drawings from references but definitely I have to practice more.
Maybe is a stupid question, but how can I draw faster? I mean I can draw faster but I make alot of mistakes.

 

Postby Waveloop » Mon Feb 11, 2013 12:00 pm

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  Waveloop
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Man... I was way to tired yesterday.... :shock:

Those green lines messed my head, it's the only explanation possible... I didn't even see the damn bridge.

My bad Perk. That was really obvious. :oops:

 

Postby Scissel » Mon Feb 11, 2013 3:14 pm

  Scissel
Posts: 53
Joined: Wed Sep 12, 2012 12:50 am

Scissel wrote: Hey there,

That's a really good effort, I would say to you to try and focus your efforts on keeping your drawing in proportion. Start off by really paying a lot of attention to the shape of the person's head. If you look at your drawing the eye's and the eye brows are in proportion with each other and mouth and chin are in proportion with each other but because you've drawn the head slightly thinner and longer than in the photo, they are now a lot thinner. So I would focus on get shape of the head right before you start drawing the details. But overall a really good effort.


I will try to focus more on proportion next time, but i think is hard to get the same proportions X_X I have to practice at this point but i don`t know how.


Hey, Sycra's just released 2 video's on Youtube,

How to Draw in Proportion Part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luJh1ASyzB8
How to Draw in Proportion Part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N87QWwQnml8

Hope they can help you.

 

Postby Thril3r » Thu Feb 14, 2013 12:39 pm

  Thril3r
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Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:24 pm

Hello again,

Here i tried to make a character face with exaggerations from more angles. (the perspective angle is not finished, but i want critiques for what i did until now)
I will try also some expressions on this character :D
Spoiler: show
Image


I tried to draw people in a city to understand the proportions of a human on street. (from reference)

Something like this
Spoiler: show
Image


But i don`t want to post here because the lines are very messy, actually the entire drawing is messy X_X

Scissel wrote:
Hey, Sycra's just released 2 video's on Youtube,

How to Draw in Proportion Part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luJh1ASyzB8
How to Draw in Proportion Part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N87QWwQnml8

Hope they can help you.


Thank you.

P.S: next time i will try to scan my drawings or i will try to draw in photoshop :)

 

Postby alnoth » Thu Feb 14, 2013 12:46 pm

  alnoth
Posts: 1271
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kind of weird to post this in a critique section:
I tried to draw people in a city to understand the proportions of a human on street. (from reference). But i don`t want to post here because the lines are very messy, actually the entire drawing is messy X_X


:?

concerning the head - make sure you understand how nostrils are placed in the nose, i think the nose of the character is beyond stylised.

 

Postby perkexpert » Thu Feb 14, 2013 9:30 pm

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  perkexpert
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Hi Thriler,

i agree with alnoth here, don't try exagerating before you actually are sure where facial feature are attached and how they relate to one another.
Yout head has a lot of structural issues, like the nose or the eyes. Those shapes still look two dimensional. If you start understanding and drawing the form,
the will start to look more threedimensional.
I've drawn so many faces and studied a lot and still i have to use reference a lot, because the face is a complex structure (or a simple or both....), so - slow down.
Cheers and keep it up!
Homo sapiens non urinat in ventum
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Postby Thril3r » Mon Mar 18, 2013 1:37 am

  Thril3r
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Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:24 pm

Hello again, has passed some time from last post, now I am trying to finish this and i want to know what do you think, also critiques.

stage1
Spoiler: show
Image


Adjustments
Spoiler: show
Image


Last sketch
Spoiler: show
Image


Shadow/light
Spoiler: show
Image


An effect (just for orientation) this will be improved.
Spoiler: show
Image


I will change his left hand also from galss i will make a cup.
Hope you will like it.

 

Postby alnoth » Mon Mar 18, 2013 9:12 am

  alnoth
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i think the line work could use some more effort.

but anyways, to make it more believable i would push his cheek up and distort the lower lid of his eye where he is leaning on his hand. also, i would tilt his head, since it is resting on his right hand only, its strange that it should be perfectly evened out horizontally.

 

Postby Thril3r » Mon Mar 18, 2013 11:08 pm

  Thril3r
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alnoth wrote:i think the line work could use some more effort.

but anyways, to make it more believable i would push his cheek up and distort the lower lid of his eye where he is leaning on his hand. also, i would tilt his head, since it is resting on his right hand only, its strange that it should be perfectly evened out horizontally.


Thanks for response, i will try to make the changes :)

 

Postby Thril3r » Tue Mar 19, 2013 1:28 am

  Thril3r
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My desk
Spoiler: show
Image

Spoiler: show
Image

 

Postby perkexpert » Tue Mar 19, 2013 8:20 pm

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Hi Thriler,

very good thing you keep practicing! I like your somewhat strange big-headed figure! Nice start on having a somewhat finished piece there!
And the study of your desk is a good starting point. Now take a photo and make it greyscale....see where the brightest part is, look for the darkest spot
then, adjust and overpaint, be bold, squint eyes, spend shitloads of time on it. You think it's done? Flip Canvas. Spend two hours more. Done? Never! Photorealistic? No? Why not?
Compare...compare again. Rinse, repeat. If you don't see anything what could be made better, return and post your best work. Nothing less. You can do it! So, take up that stylus and return to your desk!
Homo sapiens non urinat in ventum
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/artofhannesmangelsdorf/
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