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Postby godsi » Wed Mar 07, 2018 3:33 am

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Subject title: Jolyne Cujoh Painting

Hello again everyone. Here's another one of my paintings, this time it's fanart of Jolyne from Stone Ocean. I'd like a general critique, and yes I'd like to keep the green gradient coming from below. If it doesn't work I'd like to know how to fix it. If it looks fine, then great! Also, I've posted two versions with different backgrounds. Please let me know which background looks better!
Thank you!
jolynev2.png
jolyne.png

 

Postby Josephcow » Wed Mar 07, 2018 7:16 am

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Nice work! I like the green gradient on the light background. Is the green gradient just kind of a graphic element, or does her skin actually change color?

I feel that the lips are rather odd, but I recognize that this is a stylistic choice of yours.

 

Postby godsi » Wed Mar 07, 2018 6:47 pm

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Josephcow wrote:Nice work! I like the green gradient on the light background. Is the green gradient just kind of a graphic element, or does her skin actually change color?

I feel that the lips are rather odd, but I recognize that this is a stylistic choice of yours.


Thank you for the response! The gradient is a graphic choice, I just added it on a whim and decided to keep it. Also when you say the lips are odd, do you mean the shape or the color? If it's the shape I would like to improve on it, but the color is based on the character's design.
Thanks again! I'm really happy to hear this. :D

 

Postby Josephcow » Wed Mar 07, 2018 10:54 pm

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godsi wrote:
Thank you for the response! The gradient is a graphic choice, I just added it on a whim and decided to keep it.


Good! It reads that way too me.

The thing with the lips is that in real life lips have a soft edge where they begin and end, and usually it works well to render them blurred off. But in the case of lipstick, it's different. There is a place where the green lipstick needs to end, otherwise we get the feeling that the lipstick is smeared or that her lips are really green, but are very large.

Something like this is more what I would do.

Side note is I don't really mind how you've done the hair, except it might be worth it do a kind of gradient from bottom to top so that only the top of the head has the brightest highlight. This shows that the hair isn't flat, but wraps around the head more than it does when you give each lock the same amount of light.

Overall your work is looking very sharp, and has really developed!
joyline.png

 

Postby godsi » Wed Mar 07, 2018 11:08 pm

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Josephcow wrote:The thing with the lips is that in real life lips have a soft edge where they begin and end, and usually it works well to render them blurred off. But in the case of lipstick, it's different. There is a place where the green lipstick needs to end, otherwise we get the feeling that the lipstick is smeared or that her lips are really green, but are very large.

Something like this is more what I would do.

Side note is I don't really mind how you've done the hair, except it might be worth it do a kind of gradient from bottom to top so that only the top of the head has the brightest highlight. This shows that the hair isn't flat, but wraps around the head more than it does when you give each lock the same amount of light.

Overall your work is looking very sharp, and has really developed!


I understand! Thank you very much, I'll be sure to keep that in mind in my next paintings.

 

Postby Spider » Wed Mar 07, 2018 11:46 pm

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Very nicely rendered!
I have the same thoughts on the lips.

Also the end of the braid seems really unrendered compared to the rest of her hair anyway, looks a little more like a blob than loose hair?
Another suggestion I have is to possibly add some looser strands of hair coming off her green bangs, over the purple part of her hair. Or some looser strands to the purple hair in general. At first glance the purple section didn't read as hair to me, but its a pretty simple modification you could make.

Otherwise, all looks good, your painting skills have really improved! :D

 

Postby godsi » Thu Mar 08, 2018 7:33 pm

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Spider wrote:Very nicely rendered!
I have the same thoughts on the lips.

Also the end of the braid seems really unrendered compared to the rest of her hair anyway, looks a little more like a blob than loose hair?
Another suggestion I have is to possibly add some looser strands of hair coming off her green bangs, over the purple part of her hair. Or some looser strands to the purple hair in general. At first glance the purple section didn't read as hair to me, but its a pretty simple modification you could make.

Otherwise, all looks good, your painting skills have really improved! :D


Thank you! Now that I look at it, I agree that the hair isn't as detailed as I first thought it was. It was strange working with these colors, but now I see where I could improve! Thanks for the reply.


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