Submit your artwork for critiques here, or give someone else some helpful criticism or advice on their artwork. Please keep things civil.

Moderators: SeaQuenchal, Waveloop, imcostalong, Ambiguity, virtueone

 

Postby SlimRock » Sun Jul 16, 2017 6:39 am

User avatar
  SlimRock
Posts: 421
Joined: Sun Aug 12, 2012 2:09 am
Location: U.S Texas

Subject title: The Grand Bishop

This is the Grand Bishop.
He is one of my characters on the Artstation challenge. I've been having a lot of fun with this challenge and I encourage everyone to participate in any Art challenge wherever you may find them because one learns a lot ;) .
If you wish to follow the progress, you can check it out here https://www.artstation.com/artist/muk1r1/challenges
Grand Bishop.jpg

 

Postby Josephcow » Sun Jul 16, 2017 6:07 pm

User avatar
  Josephcow
Posts: 680
Joined: Mon Jun 30, 2014 9:46 pm

First of all this design is great! I have really liked all your designs so far. This one is especially strong in the costume and silhouette. So I'm not really going to critique that so much, but your rendering and presentation could use work in my opinion.

My critique in one word: simplify!

You over-render, you outline, you add unnecessary details. Let's look at the arms for example. I can tell you put a lot into rendering all of this and I do appreciate that, but what I'm essentially telling you is that if you put less work in, it will look better. You don't need all those tones in the arms. You don't need any rimlight on the bottom of the arms. You don't need black lines to delineate forms. Remember arms are basically cylinders! the tiniest indication of extra muscles is enough to get a good read. And here I have to comment that while your drawing everywhere else is really good, the drawing of the arms is a little weak. If his arms are that swol his hands would be enormous as well. Like fricken Garfield paws. So i feel like you kind of squished them to get the arms crossing pose.

The gold bits I simplified just to show the bigger structure. You can add the details back to them once you reestablish the simple form which you kind of lost. Form first, details second.

The white cloth needs to be simpler. I selected all the white areas of the pattern and repainted it with a few big brush strokes. Since that part of the design is not very complicated, you shouldn't have all those brush marks all over. And where it goes into the shadow of the cloak would actually be a cast shadow, so there would not be a gradual transition. Look for places where you can clarify the lighting, not make it more complicated. Think about adding details as not painting more stuff, but painting what you already have more specifically.

presentation:

-forget about the grey shape in the background. It's way too dark and doesn't actually add to your design. The crosses I just took out because it was too hard to paint around them. But that too could be a special move he could have but doesn't necessarily have to appear on his design page.

-Give your design some room. it feels pretty cramped on the canvas. If he is floating give him room to do so. Don't just slap a cast shadow on the ground if it doesn't even fit in the canvas.
Grand%20B2ishop.jpg

 

Postby SlimRock » Mon Jul 17, 2017 8:42 am

User avatar
  SlimRock
Posts: 421
Joined: Sun Aug 12, 2012 2:09 am
Location: U.S Texas

Thanks for the Epic comment Josephcow. i much appreciate it.
I can tell you took time to provide the ample feedback, you even did an overpaint, and that's a plus. I will look into your critiques and see what I can implement :) :)
Josephcow wrote:First of all this design is great! I have really liked all your designs so far. This one is especially strong in the costume and silhouette. So I'm not really going to critique that so much, but your rendering and presentation could use work in my opinion.

My critique in one word: simplify!.

 

Postby Alpacky » Tue Jul 18, 2017 1:49 am

User avatar
  Alpacky
Posts: 282
Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2016 7:34 pm
Location: Massachusetts US

Yep. Your designs are always really god. But its like you took 5 good designs and chose/implemented one aspect of each into the drawing.
I at first saw it as the hat being the entire head, and not only was it better, in terms of proportions compared to the little gold one, but, it was better design wise.
try removing the little gold face entirely and see how it looks as a sorta glassy helmet :3

Plus the robo arms are cool but dont really go with anything or make sense. Maybe give him no arms and no legs, or no arms and legs. so that having the arms makes sense.


So in short, if i was designing it. I would remove the face, and arms. Give it a try and see how it looks :D
I draw stuff sometimes and it looks like this: (Latest work on page 7)http://forum.sycra.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=76279

 

Postby Alpacky » Tue Jul 18, 2017 2:17 am

User avatar
  Alpacky
Posts: 282
Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2016 7:34 pm
Location: Massachusetts US

Ok imgo excited about it and just did it myself.
Hopefully u see what I mean about simplifying stuff and picking sorta one topic to go off of instead of three or four.
The second one was the first one I did and is my favorite of the two. Although I would've changed some colors, like red to blue but otherwise I like it personally.

Idk what u we're going for as wel, as u do so idk if these hit the mark but hopefully it's helpful
IMG_3940.JPG
IMG_3932.JPG
I draw stuff sometimes and it looks like this: (Latest work on page 7)http://forum.sycra.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=76279

 

Postby SlimRock » Sat Jul 22, 2017 5:56 am

User avatar
  SlimRock
Posts: 421
Joined: Sun Aug 12, 2012 2:09 am
Location: U.S Texas

Dude Alpacky, sorry for the late response but I truly appreciate the great feedback and the time you took to do the different variations of overpaints.
if I had more time I would definitely try and implement some of those ideas, but the Artstation challenge is coming to a close and I need to focus on finishing up all the characters.
But I'll save your ideas for a later concept ;)
Alpacky wrote:Ok imgo excited about it and just did it myself.
Hopefully u see what I mean about simplifying stuff and picking sorta one topic to go off of instead of three or four.
The second one was the first one I did and is my favorite of the two.


Return to Critique This!

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron